Fear the Mighty DVR


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My DVR is a precision piece of computerized equipment. It knows the time based on info transmitted to it via satellite, probably from an atomic clock somewhere. In any case it tells time well enough to switch channels and record the programs I want to watch and keeps recording untill they finish. At least that's the way the system is SUPPOSED to work. This precise Swiss inspired system has been breaking down of late due to the fear and loathing in the hearts of certain dinosaurs.

The networks are doing their best to frustrate DVR viewers. They want us to stop recording shows, stop skipping through commercials, and at a minimum keep us from recording a show on another network. They are doing this by shifting program air times by up to two minutes in either direction.

It's really easy to do. All that's required is adding a couple of commercials to one program, and removing them from the next. Voila, In order to get the last two minutes of the program you want to watch, you have to record the next program.

This is a really annoying situation: the Network is taking choice away from the viewer. Of course, they have every right to televise their shows on their own schedules, and we as viewers have the right to stop watching their programming.

Those of you who subscribe to the "Kill your television" school of thought are probably saying "Duh" at this point. I'm sorry, some of us like to get entertainment at home by watching television, and that's who this article is aimed at.

So, for all us poor Boob Tube addicts, I pose the question: How do we come to an amicable alternative? (That's a rhetorical question, I'm working on the answer now)

Perhaps we need a major shift in the whole structure of how Networks make money. Aside from PBS with it's never ending pledge breaks, Networks make money through advertising. The paltry amount you pay your cable/satellite provider each month doesn't even pay for the cost of toilet paper at the Networks, so don't think that doubling your monthly fee will make a difference. Not to mention, nobody wants to pay that much for TV anyway.

The Solution is to put the ads into the shows. I know, you're having instant images of the cops on "Law and Order" chasing a perp through Quiznos, and remarking on how the toasting bread smells so nice, or your TV News Anchor being surrounded by various products like a 7-Eleven Big Gulp and a bottle of Old Spice.

Lets face it, we can imagine any number of horribly bad scenarios if we forget that the people making the shows have their reputations as creative artists or unbiased journalists to uphold.


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